It is at this time of year that the new year’s resolutions begin to fade and there is a return to the previous normality. This is frequently accompanied by doing nothing. Well not quite nothing, it is a place of procrastination where we want to do something but somehow it just keeps being put off. What get’s in the way?
The two messages that get caught in the brain are (1) I need to do something about….and I will do it” And (2) “There is something right now that will give me instant gratification so let’s go there.” The probability is that #1 requires effort and in this case some fear of that jumps in so the instant gratification is far more attractive.. Like everything in anger management there is always some underlying fear that precipitates the wrong course. It is no different with procrastination. The larger picture is replaced by the smaller one which is much more seductive. Regrettably it has a negative base The executive brain shuts down and the regressed instant need triumphs.
The sad thing is when a man slides into procrastination he sells himself short. A piece of him hates himself for doing that and gradually self destructive thoughts take over leading to some angry outburst (to someone else or to himself) sooner than later.
To stop requires self awareness and honesty that this is happening and what it is costing and steps to deal with it. Generally motivation comes from seeing the cost of inaction followed by some vision and urge to achieve something. It may require asking another man for honest feedback.
If not, he will stay stuck watching his life waste away, putting in time until it’s over.