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Digital backups


 

The world of Facebook and being constantly attached to the rest of the  world via Androids or I phones means that focus on where we are and who we are with is secondary to who we could be with that we are not with. e.g. as soon as we sit down to dinner or go to the gym we check to see who has text us.

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What is going on right now has become secondary to what could be going on right now.  In terms of relationships it means we have internet connections with “back ups”, potential partners who are kept waiting in the wings should the current  relationship break up. Men have more  backups than women.

What does that say about having to have a backup? That the present  relationship is not the real one, there will always be another so why bother too much, the grass is probaly greener elsewhere. And I have to have someone available and because I am really terrified of being on my own.

It is a commentary of the lack of  commitment on making the current  relationship work. It also reflects how co-dependent many people are. Sadly, this characteristic abounds with men in anger management. They have never been truly committed and are waiting to be rescued. It is a good omen for why relationships break up and we keep divorce rates so high.

From the male point of view is: what is wrong with your approach in contributing to a half hearted relationship? and why are you scared to plunge deeper?

The fear of rejection is stronger than the pull of making it work. One can ask if these are the values a man wants to teach his son to live by? And if it is not, what is he going to have to do?

Source: Washington Post

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