Money is the number one area of contention in relationships, often the subject does not get aired in a productive way instead ends up as an ongoing war zone. Numbers don’t lie so what ever they say, that is the truth in the way it is. There are four different types of attitudes: The spender who spends like there is no tomorrow, the saver who is always putting money away and can be seen as over stingy,, the giver who may feel guilty about money and finds ways to give it away, and the builder who may make daring moves and can get burnt through reckless judgment. Obviously there needs to be a balance.
If they are not in sync there will be trouble. Differences reflect differences in attitudes and values and have to be discussed, each side has a pattern and somehow priorities need to be agreed upon, a budget established and records kept. Resentments occur when one side ignores the other. Listening to where the other is coming from can get the discussion started. Always, when there is a negative reaction to the other there is a fear which cannot be ignored.
Men in anger management frequently say “she has no sense of money” but fail to follow through with workable solutions. When she earns more further jealousy can result as she has freedoms to spend as she likes and he doesn’t. He may gamble and the family suffers from his losses and anxieties. He may earn more than her and is cheap which causes friction.
It’s a minefield, talk it through together or with help.