Men like to feel good in bed, if it’s not working then there is a great sense of not being man enough. This leads to self criticism “I should be better” to identity “What’s wrong with me?’ to “I’m not good enough” and so it goes downhill.
But what does “Being good “in bed mean? That she looks at him and says “You are the most wonderful lover I have ever had” He feels he’s got it made, he has arrived and all is well with the world. He has probably focusing on what she likes. Which is wonderful if all is working, but what happens if “It” isn’t working well? Men hide weakness by faking orgasms, seek out treatment to make “It’ as hard as nails, “It” can be switched on at a moment’s notice, on command, (without Viagra)
Men want to (a) look good but (b) satisfy their women and in today’s world of horny women that can be a lot of pressure. In so many areas she is moving up the income and work scale, this has to be one area where he remains supreme. It is a man’s way of feeling connected and in charge.
Life has a hard way of forcing us to adapt to new rules. “It” doesn’t always work so is it the end of the world? How do we adapt? The word “intimacy” looms up. Handling vulnerability can turn out to be the new challenge, and as a man gets older he begins to shift his priorities. If he wants to stay connected and be respected acknowledging the truth is a good way start. If she can’t handle it he shouldn’t make that his problem. He needs to be himself.
As a footnote women fake orgasms, which is telling us what about them?