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Mis-Handling rejection

We get many clients in anger  management who have had great difficulty in handling rejection. It is as if their manhood has been demolished. The wound is deep and their response is to wound as  or more deeply their ex partner. It is pure revenge, humiliation for humiliation.

169 rejection






Behaviour such as vicious text messages to the  ex and/or to others around them. This will embarrass their ex. Phone call harassment of leaving messages  or just phoning followed by heavy breathing. It can go further, photos  when they were friends can be put on line that will potentially show their ex partner  up as lewd or slut-like. If this is coupled with alcohol then messages get even more vicious. There is no thought beyond wanting to hurt the ex, thoughts about consequences or how they will look are not on their radar screen.

Eventually the emotional fog begins to lift as they can see their woundedness In clearer daylight they may even see how dumb they were. The ex is left dealing with whatever damage has been done. It could be fear of picking up the phone, embarrassing conversations as  people click in to  a web posting. Probably thinking “I should have left him sooner”

Ultimately the cause of the rejection such as where did they screw up so she ended up saying “Get lost”, all will have to be looked at otherwise the cycle will be repeated again on some other poor victim. He needs to ‘get it’.

Source: Toronto Star


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